How To Strike Up A Conversation On The First Date

How To Strike Up A Conversation On The First Date

Meeting people for the first time can be an enjoyable experience, especially if you understand all about other people and how they like to communicate talk about and first of all listen. Here is how to strike up a conversation on text, on tinder, or on a first date.

Christian Singles

“What an idiot! He’s got no idea what to say … I’ll make something up and leave.” Is this what you think she’s thinking about you? I’m sure there were times when you ran out of lines and felt like an idiot, because “I have kept silent for over 5minutes now”.

My first tip for you, is not to put yourself under pressure to talk, and repeat to yourself: “What should I talk about? What shall I say? I will make a complete fool out of myself”. So, don’t start thinking about what you’ll say, by repeating the ME, ME, Me in your head. By doing this, you will not focus on getting to know the other person, because you are thinking about YOU, YOU, YOU! This is not the way to start communicating.

You will just take turns talking. So, here’s what to do:

Become An Expert Listener

This means that the other person is doing most of the talking. Listen, ask a lot of questions and remember to form new questions around their answers. You’ll see that your worries will go away. And here is how you get the other to tell you about them:

“What are YOU currently doing??” “Do YOU enjoy it?” “Tell me about this…..” “I hear YOU have been doing this…” “I love YOUR job description, what’s the best thing YOU love about your work?”; “I love YOUR jacket, where did you get it from? Ask question to get to know them and then ask some more questions, and then some more! He or she will love you for it!

Great subjects include work, siblings, travel, food hobbies etc.

How To Strike Up A Conversation

Ask For Their Own Opinions

When looking to strike up a conversation ask these questions and your first date could go on for hours on end:

“What do you think of…?” “What is your opinion on…? Have you heard about what happened to…? Isn’t he/she…?” Respect their opinions, without getting into an argument.Wait until they ask about you and then be brief and make them ask more questions this means they have too, been listening and are indeed interested in what more you have to say. Make connections to what the other person has said about them- this will show you remember what they told you.

Topics to avoid

Their past – Never ask about past lovers on a first date unless they bring it up. You never know things ended and your date may still feel hurt from a past relationship and it would only put tension on your date.

Their parents – Asking about their parents could turn out against you, especially if their parents are divorced or separated when they were very young.

Politics and religion – These are hot topics and when used in a first date, can be a real turn off.

If your date and you enjoy being together all will run smoothly, and once you get some laughter, you know it’s been a success.

This article has been contributed by Aishwarya Vohra from Offshore Ally. She is one of the many talented SEO link builders and virtual assistant of the company. She likes to read and write on the subject of human psychology, food and music. Connect with her via Twitter.

Conversations for the Second Date

Christian Singles

The second date is a critical time in any new relationship. The first date may not have involved much talking and chances are you did not get to know each other as much as you would have liked. For the relationship to progress, there are questions that should be asked to help you figure out what type of future you may have with this person.

Find out what are the person’s interests. There may be some common ground that you both share and this can serve as a foundation to build on the relationship. You may speak on your likes and dislikes on many topics and find his/her opinion on these subjects. There are many things to talk about, just choose one and learn what the other person thinks about it. These may include questions such as what do you like to do in your spare time or do you like to watch sports.

You may also ask questions about the person’s past. When treading on this territory, exercise special care in the delivery of your inquiries. Certain discussions may bring up hurtful memories from the past. Focus on happy themes and the person’s favorite foods that he/she enjoyed eating while growing up. This will lighten the mood and allow you to become better acquainted with your date.

As you continue conversing, it is very important to raise the subject of what your partner looks for in a relationship. This will provide you with a window to your date’s soul and showcase the qualities that characterize that person.

At this point, you may delve into the personal beliefs of your date. This will give you an idea as to who you are dating. Ask the person about life changing moments and its impact on his/her life.

Having discussions about the person’s future is another ideal topic to raise during your second encounter. The fact that there is a second date indicates that the potential exists for an ongoing relationship. Their future plans will be a good way to test your compatibility. Stay away from questions such as when he/she would like to get married or how many kids he/she wants to have. Chat about each other’s dreams, goals and aspirations. You do not want to scare your date away with too many intrusive questions. Bear in mind that it is only a second date, so keep your dialogue limited to more introspective topics.

When going out with a person for the second time, such an encounter should not be primarily about interrogation. Your date should not face a barrage of questions. Instead he/she should be engaged in active, stimulating conversation that will eventually answer all your questions. The discussion should feel natural and be engaging. Look your date in the eyes when he/she is responding. This shows your interest in the dialogue. Maintaining a relaxed and balanced state of mind will grant you a successful second date. Once everything goes well, there will be many more dates in the future.

Haliyma Barrow holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Spanish and a minor in journalism from Indiana University of Pennsylvania, and a Master of Public Administration from New York University. Barrow regularly contributes articles at online writing sites such as EduBook, EzineArticles and Screen Junkies, with focus on dating related topics.