Did you recently break up with your girlfriend or boyfriend? Whether the whole thing was a big surprise or you saw it coming a mile away it still turned your world upside down. When your life is a mess and all you can think about is getting back together, it’s time to figure out what tactics will help you win your ex back.
Step one: Show your ex boyfriend or girlfriend that you are on their side. Tell them you agree with their reasons to break up with you. This sounds strange because you probably don’t really feel that way but you are acknowledging that their reasons for breaking up are valid ones. You may be surprised how this lets them feel less defensive and that you are on the same side.
Step Two: Show them that you have changed. This means that you have to get past the natural desire to sit around and mope and get out of the house. Go out with your friends, start a new hobby, and get your mind off your troubles. As you loosen up and begin to have some fun you’ll become more attractive and appealing to your ex and to others. You can’t underestimate the power of this. As you appear more like the person your ex fell in love with they will become more interested.
Step Three: Really listen to your ex. When they are ready to talk to you it’s important that you don’t become defensive but really try to hear what they have to say about why they wanted to break up. This is the only way you can work on the problems and have a chance at success if you decide to try again.
Step Four: Apologize openly and sincerely. You will have to make yourself vulnerable and admit freely what you did wrong and how you want to make things right. This is about you coming clean and not the time to confront them about their mistakes. You don’t want to make them defensive but disarm them with your honesty and humility.
Your best chance at winning back your ex lies in these 4 steps which help you clear the slate for a fresh start. Getting your ex to open up around you by getting past their defenses is the key to getting that second chance to make things work. When things start to “click” again be careful not to push too hard or move too quickly. When you have to work for something it all of a sudden becomes more valuable, and this includes relationships.