Facebook the New Little Black Book

Christian Singles

Have you noticed that when girls ask for you contact details, they always ask if you’ve got Facebook? Facebook is becoming a necessity to meet, and contact women.

You are probably reading this whilst logged into it. People within earshot are talking about who did what, and posted what, and said what on it, even your grandmother is on it. It is the social vehicle that according to CNN helped coordinate the North African revolts, and connected 100 million ranters like me with an audience to listen.

Face facts, Facebook may become outdated in five years time, its space overtaken by some new fad, but for now it rules the roost. Connecting friends, connecting enemies who want to keep their quarries under surveillance, connecting businesses with consumers. But Facebook as an option for online dating connections, takes this networking tool into a league even top dating sites like Match can’t compete with.

On Facebook, your relationship status is known to everyone. If you are single, it should poke an interest from unattached ladies. Women like to keep their relationship status as active. No woman wants to have her Facebook relationship status as “single“ or “not in a relationship“ for very long.

Think about it, everyone is on display, most have their relationship status showing, their pics of themselves, their info, their likes, their wants, they are there on their profile in plain view to those they are connected with. There is an ability to message in an instant, to hunt down an old flame in a moment, to find and to be found.

Advantage has been taken of this connectedness by a range of dating applications like speed-date, yet the real benefit of Facebook as a means to get the girl is not in the apps. it is in the platform itself. Any fool can use it, and I know you have received friend requests from such fools, but you will have received friend requests from girls you are interested in too.

Have you used the tool at your fingertips to make that connection about more than the posterity of having a triple digit friend count? Information in the dating game is key, the more we know the more we can show. It is not about trickery, reading up on the girl we like and coming up with pre-prepared lines that will woo her.

Even if you have a girlfriend already, through Facebook you will be able to always know how she is feeling. Less risk of misunderstandings, and the misreading of emotions, improving the longevity of a relationship.

No girlfriend? A  perfect match can be made. Chances are that if you’ve got a Facebook account, you’ve got a girlfriend, or are soon to get one.

The information we have on potential girlfriends helps us to decide if this person is really someone we could like over the long haul. There is more information on a Facebook wall than is attainable through any dating specific site.

Even if the wall shows an inordinate amount of game app postings like Farmville, we can tell the person is either boring, has an addictive personality, or indeed is bored and looking for someone new to spend their time with. We can see from the comments and posts they make what is important to them, and determine if these are in line with the things that are important to us.

There are enough girls in your friends list right now to keep you dating for years, and you’ll probably find something lasting. But Facebook too can be used in the hunt for fresh girls, girls unknown to you, people you can seek out, or have them come to you by being in the places, by connecting with the people, by commenting in pages that interests you, you can catch their eye.

Turning a friend into “something more“ is as simple as communicating, and communicating is what Facebook is all about. Striking up a conversation that can go on for hours, stretch over days to be picked up on and continued until you know you are both in “like“ with each other. Facebook is, and most likely will always be free, putting up with those spammy messages, and in your face Facebook links to sponsors is well worth the return, when that return is chance to mingle with multi millions of potential matches.

Strike a match, and light a fire that will last well beyond the shelf life of the place where the match was found.

Nicholas Jackman loves writing about dating and social media. Follow Nicholas on Twitter here.

Is Social Media Destroying Romance?

Christian Singles

Facebook is great and we can stay in contact with all the people and give them a poke or a comment whenever we want. But is this to the detriment of the excitement we get at the beginning of a relationship as we can already find out a lot about our potential partner just by looking at their Facebook pages and twitter feed.

One problem is that if you look at the Facebook page of your potential partner, you already know a lot of the information about them and you don’t want to give the impression of being a “Facebook stalker”, which a lot of people tend to throw around quite flippantly. But really when you are taking an interest in what they think and what is actually going on around their life.

At the same time it is quite hard to find the correct balance of when you post something on your partners wall as to not come across as a love sick puppy dog, because it almost becomes part and parcel with becoming more than friends with someone when to display your affection through social networks.

The dreaded ‘relationship status’ is another social media relationship obstacle that I’m sure does more harm than good. At what point in the relationship do you change the relationship status seems to be the question that hasn’t quite been answered by many relationship experts. God forbid you display you are in an “open relationship”, that just screams out the wrong signals, so avoid at all costs.

All of this makes you wonder how it affects the start of any relationship and what thought processes go through people’s mind as Facebook and your friends start to scrutinise your relationship status.

It can also inspire jealousy, whereas you used to be able to be in a relationship with a sense of naive bliss, now you can’t go a minute without finding out some new girl has started at the work place or some guy making some inappropriate comments to your girlfriend’s status. Of course an important aspect to any relationship is trust, and more often than not our partners are deserved of the trust we put into them, but it’s natural self preservation to protect the one you love. Its natural instinct and is wrong to fight it, just remember there are levels of trust with any relationship.

We need to get back to the basics when courting and I don’t mean finding prospects at the local discotheque, real romantic gestures need to be commonplace again and we need to not rely on the ‘poke’ button as the building blocks of any relationships. After all, it won’t make for a romantic story when you are gray and old and people ask you how you first met one another.

Andy is working for a Unique Silver Jewellery company and loves his work. Follow him on Twitter andym23