Conversations for the Second Date

The second date is a critical time in any new relationship. The first date may not have involved much talking and chances are you did not get to know each other as much as you would have liked. For the relationship to progress, there are questions that should be asked to help you figure out what type of future you may have with this person.

Find out what are the person’s interests. There may be some common ground that you both share and this can serve as a foundation to build on the relationship. You may speak on your likes and dislikes on many topics and find his/her opinion on these subjects. There are many things to talk about, just choose one and learn what the other person thinks about it. These may include questions such as what do you like to do in your spare time or do you like to watch sports.

You may also ask questions about the person’s past. When treading on this territory, exercise special care in the delivery of your inquiries. Certain discussions may bring up hurtful memories from the past. Focus on happy themes and the person’s favorite foods that he/she enjoyed eating while growing up. This will lighten the mood and allow you to become better acquainted with your date.

As you continue conversing, it is very important to raise the subject of what your partner looks for in a relationship. This will provide you with a window to your date’s soul and showcase the qualities that characterize that person.

At this point, you may delve into the personal beliefs of your date. This will give you an idea as to who you are dating. Ask the person about life changing moments and its impact on his/her life.

Having discussions about the person’s future is another ideal topic to raise during your second encounter. The fact that there is a second date indicates that the potential exists for an ongoing relationship. Their future plans will be a good way to test your compatibility. Stay away from questions such as when he/she would like to get married or how many kids he/she wants to have. Chat about each other’s dreams, goals and aspirations. You do not want to scare your date away with too many intrusive questions. Bear in mind that it is only a second date, so keep your dialogue limited to more introspective topics.

When going out with a person for the second time, such an encounter should not be primarily about interrogation. Your date should not face a barrage of questions. Instead he/she should be engaged in active, stimulating conversation that will eventually answer all your questions. The discussion should feel natural and be engaging. Look your date in the eyes when he/she is responding. This shows your interest in the dialogue. Maintaining a relaxed and balanced state of mind will grant you a successful second date. Once everything goes well, there will be many more dates in the future.

Haliyma Barrow holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Spanish and a minor in journalism from Indiana University of Pennsylvania, and a Master of Public Administration from New York University. Barrow regularly contributes articles at online writing sites such as EduBook, EzineArticles and Screen Junkies, with focus on dating related topics.


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